... the kind that respect their professors, and the kind that attend MY university.

Annoyance Factor (1-10): 7.5

THURSDAY WAS the first day of my research methods class. It has an enrollment cap of 14, mainly because the final product of the course is a 30-page paper and I'm expected to give lots of detailed feedback along the way ("the butterfly drawings on the cover are lovely, but they're not really APA-style").

The class was full, and before it began, a student approached and asked if she could add. I thought, "well... 15 is a nice, round number! I think I can manage one more." Okay. Done.

When class is over and all the students have left, I'm gathering up my stuff to go when the door opens and a strange girl walks up to me and asks if she can add. I tell her the class is closed.

She's distraught. I just don't understand! She's a graduating senior, and this is the last class that she needs to take to graduate, and if I don't let her in, her life will be ruint. RUINT, I tell you. She REALLY NEEDS THIS CLASS. She'll do anything to get into it! Anything!!

I tell her that maybe she can get into the new methods/stats-remix class that, after this semester, will be the new curriculum. It should fulfill the same requirement. But she's already taken the stats and doesn't feel like going through that portion of it again.

I tell her that maybe she can take it a local community college and tranfer the credits. But she's not sure if it will transfer and besides, she'd rather take it here.

I think about it. One of the few perks of working at a small, liberal arts university is that I don't have to have classes with lots of students in them. I've already taken one person beyond the cap, just to be nice. Not only do I not feel like grading sixteen 30-page papers, but I don't think I'll be an effective professor with that much feedback to give. The students won't get their comments back in a reasonable amount of time. But just in case, I ask her:

"So if this class is so very important to you... why weren't you here for it?" I mean, if I really needed a class that badly, I'd be there 10 minutes early, sitting in the front row. And I also know that graduating seniors get priority registration, so I don't get how she missed out, here. Maybe she's got a compelling reason.

"Ummmm... I decided to stay later at work today," she says. I think she knows this wasn't a brilliant answer, but apparently she doesn't think well on her feet.

I think again for a minute. Finally: "well, that's really a choice you made, I guess." I feel a little like the jerky professor. But it's true. Among other things, I'm supposed to be teaching responsibility and causality and this kind of stuff, right? I actually feel a little bad, but I'm also irritated that she's put us both in this position. If she had just been in class like the girl I had already added, I would have added her instead. She had priority as a graduating senior. But she hadn't been in class, and I had already added the other gal, and I didn't want 16 students in this class. So there you have it.

She stalked off. Pout-face supreme.

The next day, my chair asks if we can talk. Sure we can talk. I wonder what it could be about? It's only the second day of class.

"So I hear you refused to add (so-and-so) to your Methods class. How come?" She steeples her fingers and peers at me over them, attempting to look sage and as though she's honestly interested in my answer. But I know better, and this isn't going to end well for me. I can't believe that this student, failing to get what she wanted, marched straight to the chair of my department and complained. I also can't believe that my chair is about to tell me to suck it up. But I know this is what's going to happen. Our students are our bosses and they know it.

I tell her the story, and she shakes her head sadly. "Yeah, so... I'm going to have to ask you add her. Okay?"

What can I say? She's the head of my rank & tenure committee. She's my boss. Sure, I'll add so-and-so. I already foolishly added one more than I wanted, and now I've got two more. Worse yet, when I come to class on Tuesday, I'll have to try and ignore the smugness waves that will be virtually radiating off of her palpably as I sign her add slip against my will. Try and tell her she can't add my class, will I? I don't know who I'm dealing with here. I'll add her and I'll like it.

Well, I'll add her, but I don't have to like it. She'll get whatever grade she earns, but I'm not her pal.

Right. Actually, I'm her employee. Nothing like being pushed around by a 19-year-old to make you feel efficacious.